Don Wants a Divorce

Twenty-three years is about to come to an end. He's right about all of it -- we don't work together well; I don't respect him and he doesn't respect me; we don't have the same goals; on and on and on. Can this marriage be saved? Should we even bother? We just barely tolerate each other some days.

I'm glad the words have been said. It's silly to live a lie. I don't want him blaming me, though. He's the one who smashed the relationship to bits with his little rock hammer. It's been coming back together very slowly. For a long long time I didn't care one bit if it ever came back together at all. For a long time I was just hanging in there until Michaela graduated from high school; then I was going to be out the door.

It's gotten a lot better since then. We've had good times together. Now I find I do care. It will be hard to say good-bye.

Our New Roommate

When Joe was hospitalized with Diabetic Ketoacidosis, Don, knowing the hospital bills would be enormous, invited him to come live with us as a way to save money. Joe's decided to take him up on it. He'll be moving in at the end of September. Now THERE'S an unexpected twist for you. And this in spite of the fact that I keep telling Don that I have strong feelings for Joe.

So much for my numerous vows to never see him again. I'll be seeing him every day! This is all so ironic that it makes me laugh. I'm kinda excited. I feel like I'm getting married. Without the sex. There will be lots of fun and companionship, but I'm pretty sure there isn't going to be any more sex. We'll get to be friends and I'll finally stop being so tongue-tied and self-conscious and stupid when I'm around him.

Six Colors

About a year ago I decided to limit my fashion palate to six colors: black, red, white, gray, beige/khaki and blue jeans. This self-enforced limitation has been a lot of fun. I've become alot more aware of fashion and style. And it's easier to pack, too, when I'm off on a trip. Everything combines in some way with everything else. And because wearing a single color almost always looks very classy (especially when that color is red or black), I always have a way to look simple yet elegant. Today I've got on black pants, a beige T, a red shirt with rolled up sleeves and a multi-colored scarf.

The Weekend!

Labor Day Weekend! I took Friday off so I could have four lovely days of freedom. Friday I got a lot of little things done around the house, then went thrift-store shopping, and finally went to hear Don's friend Jack jam with his band. Saturday it was off to the flying field to take pics of the flyers. I talked to a lot of the folks I had taken pictures of last time, and met a lot of new folks. Saturday evening D and I had dinner and played UpWords at Joe's. I took some movies to watch but J didn't like any of them. He's so damn picky. I'm sick of it. I didn't look at him the entire night. Sunday I worked on my art lessons (Mommy It's a Renoir). These simple cards are opening up a whole new world for me -- the world of the schools of art. A hillside covered with houses makes me think Cubism. A wide-open vista stretching before me to the distant mountains is Hudson River. A field with sunflowers and farmhouses calls to mind Impressionism. Don was home all day which really irritated me. I wish he had left me alone so many years ago. I wouldn't do this all again, no way. So Sunday I avoided him as much as possible. He spent the day sleeping and watching TV -- just like the old days. Monday it was dog park, computer work, thrift-store shopping again, Teller Lake Trail again, and babysitting Sara and Julia. Don went to Joe's.