I Continue In Love

And I always will. I can't stop! What follows is the shocking confession of a married woman about a man not her husband:

The day before Thanksgiving he took me up to Heil Ranch on his motorcycle. It's beautiful up there; we hiked around a bit; also squeezed in some cuddle time. After Thanksgiving dinner with my side of the family, Don and I popped over to Joe's with some Thanksgiving dinner for him. "You should call me tomorrow," I said softly when Don was in the other room. And he did! On Friday we spent several hours together at his place where we got naked, then had lunch and watched Jimmy Neutrino. Saturday night I popped over by myself while on the way back from visiting my daughter Kendall. We had some nice conversation and more making out. Sunday he brought his daughter over to our place and the three of us did puzzles. I spent the day in a happy daze, thinking about how nice it would be to pregnant. Sunday night Don and I went over to his place to watch James Bond and play UpWords. I won again! He was really sweet to me. So I've seen him every day for five days in a row. And it's still not enough. I want him always and everywhere.

I see now how a baby is an expression of love. I never really thought about it with Don. Our babies just happened along and I felt lucky that he tolerated them. It's not like we wanted to build a family as an expression of our love. That's how I feel about Joe, though. I want to have his baby and build a family together as an expression of our love.

Not that having a baby would make any sense. I'm almost 47, my girls are grown up, I've got a career which I want to keep, and I won't be able to stay home with the child. I'm sure there's tons more reasons, including not being married to the guy. But love doesn't make any sense, does it?

I invited him and his little girl over next weekend to make gingerbread houses for Christmas. They might let me come to Worlds of Wonder with them, too. So I have a nice weekend to look forward to. In the meantime, I'm going to concentrate on my work (become the best!) and my spiritual development (meditation, Science of Mind). I'm going to try to think about something besides his smile and his bright eyes every minute of every day the way I usually do.