Monday, October 08, 2007

The Technique of the Love Affair

I am reading the most incredible book -- "The Technique of the Love Affair" by a gentlewoman. Absolutely fabulous advice, much of which I deliberately ignored in my relationship with Joe. I had thought that since the relationship itself was so non-traditional perhaps I could dispense with traditional forms of behavior. I spent a year -- more than a year -- in tremendous pain. It turns out that traditional behavior is a wonderful emotional protector.

Some pithy truths: A man who is not chasing you is a man who is not interested. It is essential while in a love relationship to keep up your friends and your interests -- the man must never feel that he is indispensable to you. A man smothered in love becomes satiated and bored. When a guy learns that he is indispensable to you he will lose interest so you can't let him know that. Be friendly and sweet and light-hearted, but keep the attitude that you can take him or leave him.

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